I spent years dreaming of this baby until the moment I told my husband, and he asked if it was too late to undo it. Days later, his mother gave me her own condition for staying in the family.
Most of my friends had already become mothers. And I…
I was jumping from one clinic to another. The doctors said all kinds of things.
I lived in those “maybes.” I was afraid to dream too far ahead. I kept silent about it even to myself.
My husband, Aiden, and I had tried for years.
Charting ovulation. Weekly doctor visits. Hope that rose and collapsed again.
Aiden had held me through every negative test…
until that moment.
When I finally saw those two lines, I didn’t believe them at first. I sat there in silence, holding the test to my chest like something sacred.
“Aiden?” I called my husband in a trembling voice. “We’re having a baby.”
He walked out of his office like someone had summoned him for a job interview.
“I thought so too.
But look…” I showed him the test, then another. “And the doctor confirmed it—almost nine weeks now.”
He stepped closer. Smiled.
But his eyes… they stayed distant.
“So… you want to keep it? Maybe it’s not too late to reconsider?”
“What?!
Are you serious?! Aiden, this is what we dreamed of!”
I didn’t know how to respond. I told myself it was shock, surprise.
Maybe he was scared. People say foolish things when they’re scared. But something inside me clicked.
A tiny alarm bell—danger.
I tried to hug my husband. He let me, but he didn’t hug me back.
***
The days that followed should have been filled with warmth, with excitement. Instead, they felt like a cold draft moving through my life.
Aiden had grown quieter, more distant, like a ghost in our home.
He didn’t touch the baby books I left on the coffee table. Didn’t react when I showed him the tiny onesies I ordered online.
One evening, I sat beside him on the couch, holding two swatches of paint in my hands.
“Sunshine Pearl or Soft Meadow?” I asked gently.
“The nursery. You said you liked yellow last year…”
He didn’t even look at the colors.
“I’m too tired to think about that now, Lynn.
Can we not do this?”
He sighed.
“I know. But do we really need to plan the entire future in one week?”
I stared at him, my throat tightening.
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