My siblings have mixed opinions—my older brother thinks I’m being heartless, while my younger sister understands my worries. Neither of them can take our parents in since they both live in small apartments.”
“My parents have been trying to guilt-trip me, reminding me that they took care of me as a child and now it’s my turn to take care of them. They’ve also been telling our extended family that I’m abandoning them, leading to messages from relatives criticizing me. This is making me doubt my decision, even though I’m certain my mental health would suffer if they moved in.
Was I wrong to refuse them after they lost their house? Should I be more accommodating, or is it okay to prioritize my well-being and boundaries? I’m feeling very conflicted and could use some outside perspective.”
Many people supported her decision.
“It was their JOB to take care of you growing up, you didn’t ask to be born. It’s not your job nor responsibility to take care of them.” redditpusiga/ Reddit
“If you let them move in, they’ll never move out. They will take over your house, try to control your life, and will amp up the expectations of what you ‘owe’ them and will keep guilt-tripping you until the end.” Iworkinacupboard / Reddit
“Please, learn from my mistakes. I regret letting my mom move in with me. Biggest regret of my life so far. She’s been staying with me for about a year now, and I did not expect her to be here that long, but it just happened.” Western_Ad4843 / Reddit
“For your own sake, mental health and wellbeing, DO NOT let them move in! They have turned to guilt you so you’ll ’forget’ all about their past behaviors and hopefully be convinced that family does come first.” LoveBeach8 / Reddit
“If you let them move in, the only chance you ever have to not live with them again will be to move out, leave everything you own behind, and keep paying their rent” isawsparks27 / Reddit
“Keep in mind this did not just happen to them. You don’t just miss a payment and you are out on the street. They had months and months to try to figure something out, take out a loan, get a second job, make payment arrangements, try to sell the home, etc. This is on them, and there is no reason for you to feel guilty.” Helpful-Science-3937 / Reddit
“If the brother’s apartment is that small, they can choose any of the relatives that are sending messages.” No-Archer8974 / Reddit
“I do agree that family should help each other out, but you tried so many other ways. You can lead a horse to water, but you don’t have to give it yours.” One_Trifle1191 / Reddit
