My boyfriend snapped and demanded I be more feminine. He had no idea how far I could take it.
Jaden constantly accused me of acting like a man because I wore jeans and didn’t always have nail polish on. He’d compare me to his ex who wore heels everywhere and never raised her voice above a whisper.
When I got promoted at work, he sulked for weeks, saying I only got it because I acted like a dude.
After I fixed our sink myself, he exploded.
“You need to start acting like an actual woman,” he said. “Be feminine for once instead of stomping around like a guy. How am I supposed to sleep with someone who’s basically a man?”
I set down my wrench and smiled sweetly.
You want feminine? I can do that.
The next morning, I spent four hours getting ready for his family brunch, curling every eyelash and redoing my nails three times because the color wasn’t perfectly feminine. Jaden had to arrive without me and explained to his mother why I needed so much time to look presentable for them.
She took it as him criticizing my appearance.
When I finally arrived looking like a pageant queen, his mom pulled me aside to ask if Jaden was making me feel ugly.
I started speaking in a soft baby voice and acting terrified of everything masculine, which meant Jaden had to handle all the scary stuff—talking to mechanics, dealing with our landlord, and even ordering pizza—because phone calls were too aggressive for delicate women.
When his friends came over to watch the game, I served them snacks while trembling and flinching whenever they raised their voices about plays. It made everyone uncomfortable, and they started asking Jaden why his girlfriend seemed so scared of men.
His best friend stopped inviting him anywhere because he said watching me act terrified was too disturbing.
At his company barbecue, I wore heels so high I needed Jaden’s arm constantly, clinging to him and gasping whenever a man came near because strange men were intimidating. His female co-workers watched him basically holding me up all day and started whispering about what kind of relationship we had.
When his boss tried to shake my hand, I hid behind Jaden and whispered that touching strange men wasn’t appropriate.
It made his boss think Jaden had trained me to fear other men.
HR actually pulled Jaden aside later to ask if they needed to be concerned about his home situation.
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