Father: “Why did you fail your mathematics test?”
Johnny: “On Monday, the teacher said 3+5=8.”
Father: “So?”
Johnny: “On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8
And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8…
…
.. . If she can’t make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?”
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Benjamin was in jail serving 30 years for robbing banks.
After serving about 12 years he is notified that his Uncle from Ludhiana has died and left him over $50000. Benjamin was so happy when the warden said he would put it in trust untll he was released. The warden asked him if there was anything he wanted to buy before tying the money up.
Benjamin said he had read a lot about computers and wanted a computer. The warden said “sure” and got him a computer. A brand new Compaq computer.
After a few weeks the warden visitied him in his cell to see how he was doing. To his amazement he saw the computer smashed on the floor. The warden asked Benjamin what happened.
Benjamin said it didn`t work right and he got mad. He said it would not even complete the simplest task. The warden asked him what he wanted the computer to do.
Benjamin said he just wanted one thing from the computer. One simple task and it could not do it. Benjamin said, “I hit the escape key and nothing happened, I hit the key again and still nothin, I am still here.
I think I will sue Compaq.”
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The right answerr. The teacher said, “I’ll give 2 dollars to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived.”
An Irish boy put his hand up and said, “It was St. Patrick.” The teacher said, “Sorry Sean, that’s not correct.”
Then a French boy put his hand up and said, “It was Napoleon.” The teacher replied, “I’m sorry, Pierre, that’s not right either.”
Finally, a Jewish boy raised his hand and said, “It was Jesus Christ.” The teacher said, “That’s absolutely right, Maurice, come up here and I’ll give you 2 dollars.”
As the teacher was giving Maurice his money, she said, “You know Maurice, you being Jewish, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ.”
Maurice replied, “Yeah.
The story doesn’t end here — it continues on the next page.
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