“Sister Ann, aren’t you putting on a little weight?”
inquired Father Dan during his visit to the convent, suspiciously eyeing her bulging stomach. “Why, no Father,” answered the nun demurely, “It’s just a little gas.”
A few months later Father Dan put the same question to the nun noticing her habit barely fit across her belly. “Oh, just a bit of gas,” said sister Ann, blushing a bit.
On his next visit Father Dan was walking down the corridor when he passed Sister Ann wheeling a baby carriage. Looking in, the priest observed, “Cute little Fart!”
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A priest decides one mid weekday to visit one of his elderly parishioners, Mrs. Smith.
He rings the door bell and Mrs. Smith appears. “Good Day Mrs.
Smith. I just thought I would drop by and see how your are doing.”
The woman says, “Oh just fine Father, come on in and we`ll have some tea.”
While sitting a the coffee table, the priest notices a bowl of almonds on the table. “Mind if I have one?”, the priest says.
“Not at all, have as many as you like”. After a few hours the priest looks at his watch and alarmed at how long he has been visting says to Mrs Smith, “Oh my goodness, look at the time. I must be going.
Oh dear, I`ve eaten all your almonds. I`ll have to replace them next time I visit.”
To which Mrs Smith replied, “Oh don`t bother, Father. Ever since I lost all my teeth, it`s all I can do just to lick the chocolate off them.”
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A minister, a priest and a rabbi went for a hike one very hot day.
They were sweating profusely by the time they came upon a small lake with a sandy beach. Since it was a secluded spot, they left all their clothes on a big log, ran down the beach to the lake and jumped in the water for a long, refreshing swim. Refreshed, they were halfway back up the beach to the spot they’d left their clothes, when a group of ladies from town came along.
The story doesn’t end here — it continues on the next page.
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