“Before we cut this cute little cake,” she said, smiling just wide enough to show her teeth, “I have something special to share with you all.”
“Go ahead,” I said, tilting my head.
“Yeah, go on, Mom,” Matt said, smiling at her.
Diane faced the room, resting one hand on her chest like she was about to deliver a wedding toast.
“I’ve decided what we’re naming our baby!” she exclaimed.
A few people laughed, thinking it was a joke. But my mother-in-law’s expression didn’t waver.
“I’m sorry,” I said, half-laughing myself. “What do you mean?
Matt and I have narrowed our names down… but we haven’t confirmed our choice.”
“His name will be…” she said, not even glancing at me. “The baby’s name will be Clifford.
After my first love. Clifford, the most wonderful man I’ve ever known.”
I blinked slowly, feeling my baby kick in protest.
Someone coughed. I saw one of Matt’s cousins lower her mimosa. I saw a work friend hide her grimace behind her napkin.
“I’m sorry, what?” I asked again.
Diane turned her gaze toward me, finally, as if I were interrupting her monologue.
“Clifford,” she repeated.
“He was charming, successful, and a real gentleman. I dated him before I met Matt’s father. But life, you know…
it took us in different directions.”
“Mom. You’re not serious,” Matt said, stiffening beside me. “There’s no way…”
“Oh, stop!” Diane said with a light laugh.
“Clifford is a strong name. It’s a classic, Matt. And let’s be honest, Amy, your taste has never been particularly elegant, sweetheart.
You named your dog Thumper.”
