A police car pulled up in front of Grandma Bessie’s house, and out stepped Grandpa Morris. The officer politely explained, “Ma’am, your husband said he got lost in the park and couldn’t find his way home.”
Grandma Bessie stared at Morris and said, “Lost? You’ve been going to that park for 30 years!
How’d you get lost today?”
Leaning in close so the officer couldn’t hear, Grandpa whispered, “I wasn’t lost. I was just too tired to walk home.”
A policeman pulls over an old man driving a pickup truck
A policeman pulls over an old man driving a pickup truck with the bed overflowing with ducks. The officer says sternly, “Sir, you can’t have a flock of ducks wandering around downtown.
Take them to the zoo immediately!”
The old man nods, agrees, and drives off. The next day, the officer spots the same pickup truck, still full of ducks—but this time, all the ducks are wearing sunglasses. Frustrated, the officer pulls the man over again and exclaims, “I thought I told you to take these ducks to the zoo!”
The old man grins and replies, “I did!
But now the little rascals want to go to the beach!”
——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————–
A cowboy, fresh from Texas, strolls into a bar in Montana and orders three mugs of Bud. A cowboy, fresh from Texas, strolls into a bar in Montana and orders three mugs of Bud. He heads to a corner and takes a sip from each mug, one after the other, in turn.
Once he’s done, he returns to the bar and orders three more. Curious, the bartender approaches him and says, “You know, beer goes flat pretty quick after it’s poured. It might taste better if you just ordered one at a time.”
The cowboy smiles and explains, “Well, here’s the thing.
I’ve got two brothers—one in Arizona, the other in Colorado. When we all moved away from Texas, we promised that whenever we drank, we’d each have one for the others, just like we did back home. So, I’m drinking for my brothers and myself.”
The bartender nods, impressed by the sentiment, and leaves it at that.
The cowboy becomes a regular, always ordering three beers and sipping them in rotation. One day, though, he walks in and only orders two mugs. The regulars, noticing the change, go quiet.
The story doesn’t end here — it continues on the next page.
Tap READ MORE to discover the rest 🔎👇
