A newlywed blonde phones her mother and sobs

11

So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I served to the right and there was another tree!

I swerved to the left and there was…”

“Uh, ma’am?”, the officer said, cutting her off, “There isn’t a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth.”

A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in the office and said, “We need some four-by-twos.”

The clerk said, “You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?”

The man said, “I’ll go check,” and went back to the truck.

He returned a minute later and said, “Yeah, I meant two-by-fours.”

“All right. How long do you need them?”

The customer paused for a minute and said, “I’d better go check.”

After a while, the customer returned to the office and said, “A long time. We’re gonna build a house.”