When the nib of my pen finally met the paper, the clock on the mediator’s wall clicked to exactly 10:03 a.m. I noticed it because I had been watching the second hand for the better part of twenty minutes, waiting for the moment when something enormous would finally, officially, be over. The mediator’s office was a room designed to convey neutrality: beige walls, a table of polished mahogany that reflected the overhead lights, two chairs on each side that were carefully identical so neither party could feel disadvantaged by their seating.
It smelled of carpet cleaner and old paper. I had expected the moment of signing to feel like something, a door closing, a verdict being read. Instead there was only a vast and ringing silence inside my chest, the kind that follows a siege so prolonged you have forgotten what quiet felt like before it.
My name is Catherine. I am thirty-two years old, a mother to two children who had done nothing to deserve any of this, and as of five minutes ago, the former wife of David Coleman. He was the man who had once whispered promises of safety and permanence against my skin in the early years when I still believed everything he said, who had told me we were building something together, who had said our life was a partnership in the full sense of the word.
He had traded all of that for a secret life he thought I was too distracted and too grateful to notice. I had barely lifted the pen when David’s phone rang. The ringtone was a melody I had grown to loathe over the past year, not because of the sound itself but because of what it preceded: the shift in his posture, the way his attention left the room, the drop in his voice into a register of manufactured warmth that I had not heard directed at me in longer than I could clearly remember.
He did not step outside. Right there, in front of me and the stone-faced mediator whose job required her to witness this without reacting, he answered. “Yes, it’s finished.
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